I'm writing about anything, everything, and nothing simply because I don't want to have to write what I need to write about.
My Mom has breast cancer.
It's all happened so fast that all of us are still spinning.
Back in early January, my Mom had a rash on her hand so she called her Doctor to get a prescription filled. He wouldn't fill it without seeing her, so off she went. Thank you, Dr. Sussman.
While she was being examined, he noticed a lump in her underarm and sent her in for a mammogram.
My Mom has always been healthy, but has also been one to not go to her appointments like she should.
So she went and while they determined that the lump was just fatty tissue, they did find find some abnormalities during the mammogram. So, she had a biopsy, and they found cancer in her left breast.
This was at the point when she finally told me and she was very nonchalant about the whole thing. She was just glad to know what it was and that it was treatable, that there was a solution.
So, the solution is a lumpectomy to remove the cancer and lymph nodes, followed with radiation and chemotherapy.
It sucks and it's scary, and we all still can't believe that it's happened. To my Mom. I know that is how every other person who finds out that their parent has a serious illness feels.
She honestly sounds OK. She's more concerned with finding a good front closure sports bra to wear after surgery, wondering whether or not my Dad is going to overcook her chicken for dinner, or if she can find a wig that won't make her look like Dolly Parton.
I'm not going for the actual surgery, which is tomorrow and I am feeling guilty about that. Luckily my Dad and the rest of my family are there. I'm planning to go in a couple of weeks so I can help out and do whatever they need.
It's scary and while we've always said that she's tough, it's just not what you want to see your Mom go through.
To my friends in real life, I'm sorry I couldn't say anything ... I just didn't know where to start or what to say. It honestly hasn't felt real and still doesn't. The surgery is tomorrow and she should be home by 5pm. She'll find out more about radiation and chemotherapy tomorrow and we're all just hoping and praying for her Dr.'s and that the cancer is truly in an early stage.
I have always believed that prayers are private and something that you can do by yourself any time of day or night, but it's been rare that I've had to ask for people to pray for me or my family. Now I'm asking if you do pray, please consider sending up good thoughts for my Mom.