Thursday, October 09, 2008

miss manners

Don't people know that it's not polite to talk about people while they're still in earshot? I guess it's not polite to talk about people in general, but at least do it where I can't hear you.

Yes, I know that my babies are small, but if you were nice enough to say hello I would tell you that they are actually three and a half months old and that I know better than to take 2 day old infants out in public, and if you'd bother to ask me any questions, I could give you the long story that involves tales of bed rest, my water breaking, a c-section delivery, and ends with identical twin girls. And can anyone tell me why people think they are a boy and a girl? Especially when they are in matching PINK car seats, dressed in pink clothes, with girly pink toys dangling from their car seat?

I realize that this post makes me sound like I'm bitter and angry. I promise, I'm really not. Maybe I could go into my comedic mode and say, "You should've seen them when they weighed 3 and 4 pounds!" I guess I just get into my Mama Bear mode and get a little defensive. I need more comments like the one from my friend today (Hi MH!) who noticed how big they are getting and how much they have filled out.

Now, don't get me started on the grocery store employees who feel the need to pounce on me when I'm shopping and then grab their little hands. Not to be a germaphobe, but let's think about what the cashiers do all day? Handle dirty boxes and cans, dirty cash, and no telling what else. Next time, I'm self-checking and pushing the antibacterial wipes in their hands!


Kate said...

Oh you poor thing.

If it is any comfort, I used to nanny for a set of boy/girl twins and people would say, "oh, a boy and a girl! Are they identical?" And every time I just thought, please be kidding. And they never ever were.

Liz Jimenez said...

People are stupid and crazy, though I suppose more-or-less well-meaning.

I have my kids in all-blue and all-pink, and I always get "oh, two boys?" Um, yeah, sure. It's a social experiment to see what happens to the one dressed in pink. Ugh!

People used to drive me NUTS when my kids were smaller. Especially those infant carseats, two of 'em is a big crazy-person magnet. Now that my kids are bigger, I get fewer annoying comments. And I've finally reached a state of zen acceptance about most of the ones I do get. But from probably 1-8 months, I was really bitter and annoyed about all of the repetitive, dumb comments.

Susan D. said...

I loved the one when I was asked by a random lady "If they were going to turn identical?" Huh?
: )

Jules said...

I know, and I am so sorry. i remember the is SOO hard with preemies out in public. EVERYONE wants to touch (they want to touch all babies, not just preemies)and people are so rude asking and talking about them being too little to be out b/c they are too young...not realizing they have been in the world for months already! It is so hard not to be like "Get out of my face! you know nothing about our story and what I went through"


Dana said...

Oh the same happened to me too! Mine were 6 weeks early. I had boy/girl twins but even though Phoebe was dressed in Pink and Archer in something manly - I would still get asked "oh - are they identical?" I didn't have the patience for it! Not with the sleep deprivation. My comment back was "Nope not identical - at least not at the last diaper change!"